Wouldn’t you know it — I woke up sick on Saturday morning and couldn’t join my buddies for our weekend round. I called them up and told them to drop by after the round to let me know how things went.
Well, it turned out that I missed a very exciting round. When the starter found that our foursome had become a threesome he approached them with a request.
“I have a single golfer that we would like to add to your group,” he said. “But I must warn you that it is a lady golfer.”
“I’m not so sure,” said Clabbo. “We like to play quick and we don’t want anyone holding us up.”
“Yeah,” said Mootoe. As usual, Dayfe was pretty quiet. He just mumbled something.
“I can vouch for her,” the starter said. “She’s a pretty amazing golfer and I think you’ll enjoy it.”
“Okay,” they agreed and continued warming up. Soon they were called to the first tee. Standing on the tee was a very attractive woman. When she turned around to greet them they realized that they were about to spend the next 4 hours golfing with Jessica Alba! Suddenly slow play wasn’t much of a concern.
“Hello! I’m Jess,” she said as she shook hands with each of them. They managed to keep their jaws from dropping as they mumbled their names in return. Dayfe turned a wonderful shade of red. “Thank you for letting me join you today,” she continued. “I hope that I don’t slow you down too much.”
She waited patiently as the 3 amigos took their tee shots and then santered up to the red tees and proceeded to stripe one right down the middle. Clabbo remarked to me later that he wasn’t sure whether he was more impressed with watching her or the shot! As they played the round the found that Jessica was an amazing golfer and a lot of fun to be with.
Finally, they were approaching the 18th and Jessica said, “Guys, this has been one of the best rounds of golf I’ve ever played. If I sink this birdie putt then this will be my personal best. I’m going to dinner with which ever one of you can help me make this putt.”
I would have liked to see the activity on that green. I can just see the guys agonizing over the 6 foot putt that she had left. After about a minute of looking Mootoe said, “Just a little break to the left. Keep it inside the cup to the right and you’re guaranteed.”
“No way,” said Clabbo. “I think it will break a bit more than that. Keep it just outside.”
Dayfe was standing there quietly through all this so Jessica turned to him and said, “Well, what’s your assessment?”
“Looks good to me,” Dayfe said quietly. “Pick it up.”
If you liked this check out more LoneWolf golf humour:
Don’t forget about Cookie Crumbles for general LoneWolf humour.
hah! If I was ever paired up with J.A, I’d probably play the worst game of my life, but I’d recall it as the best round I’ve ever played. 🙂
Comment by OrlandoGolfBlogger — December 31, 2008 @ 2:00 pm
Haha, brilliant – what a time to be ill, eh?
Comment by Joe Whitley — January 6, 2009 @ 7:15 pm
Haha…
Whenever somebody underestimates me as a girl…I felt horrible…but I learned it very well that feeling bad is not a solution…The solution is always to prove them wrong…and yes still now I am proving them wrong…
Comment by Daisy Johnson — January 15, 2019 @ 10:46 pm