After an embarrassing debacle on the first tee, LoneWolf’s game has started to warm up. With the sun a little higher in the sky, the chill in the air is gone as well.
Now the 4 intrepid golfers are walking down the fairway of the 310 yard 4th to find their balls. All 4 have found the fairway for a change and things are looking up. Looking up, that is, until LoneWolf finds his ball plugged in a small anthill.
“Is this ground under repair?” he asks. Three heads shaking confirm what he already knows — play it as it lays.
The rub of the green is not LoneWolf’s best friend right now, but he carefully chooses a club. “I think it’s about a 9 iron,” he mutters as he addresses the ball.
Something goes seriously wrong in the middle of his backswing. As his club approaches the ball it is like approaching infinity — you might get close but you’ll never reach it. A huge divot is removed from the anthill. Dead and wounded ants are scattered down the fairway. The ball remains exactly where it was.
Dayfe looks like he’s about to pee his pants as he tries (unsuccessfully) to hide his laughter. Brain and Mootoe don’t bother. The foursome on the tee behind them turn to see what all the noise is about.
LoneWolf resets his stance and swings again. This time, rather than swinging inside the ball, he manages to miss completely on the other side. Another huge chunk of anthill. Another dozen dead ants. Brain is rolling on the ground in fits of uncontrollable laughter. Mootoe has dropped his 9 iron and is doubled over with laughter.
Dayfe just smiles and quietly says, “If the rest of the ants want to live, they better get on the ball.”
This is a follow up to Just Keep Swinging. The events in these posts are fictional, but the course and players are not. The actual events are far worse 8=)
If you liked this check out more LoneWolf golf humour:
Don’t forget about Cookie Crumbles for general LoneWolf humour.
But what about the third swing? Certainly you didn’t give up with only two.
Amazing. Great depiction of a less-than-optimum situation!
Comment by Seth Simonds — May 2, 2009 @ 11:47 am
Well, the third swing is history isn’t it! A nice easy swing with lots of backspin (and flying ants) put it in tap in range. (Well, I can dream can’t I — this is fiction so I get to make it up 8=)
Comment by LoneWolf — May 2, 2009 @ 4:55 pm
After reading that and not really being a golfer but hearing about it ALL the time from my brother-in-law and have even been “forced” to leave the t.v. on a golf channel. I think it was a very funny scenario. I think it’s funny when you see someone go to swing and hit the ball and nothing happens this has happened to me when we are “forced” to go on the lawn and “just try hitting the ball” with my brother-in-law. So what I’m trying to say is I’ve got to check out your “CookieCrumbles” pages because I do like your sense of humor. Good post. Thanks for the chuckle….. jj
Comment by jj-momscashblog — July 29, 2009 @ 11:42 am
It’s always encouraging to have you drop by JJ! I know that a great many people can’t fathom what golf is about — don’t worry — you’ll understand when we get to heaven 8=)
I’ve been staying in the offline world quite a bit these past few months, so I haven’t been able to keep things updated too much, but I’m glad to have visitors none the less! I hope you enjoy a visit over at Cookie Crumbles too.
Comment by LoneWolf — July 30, 2009 @ 7:55 pm